SOMTHING NOT GETTING BAK TO NORMAL

i never knew dat one can get attached to somone like dis,as i've been.its soo difficult to stay like dis being pissed off at each other,not talkin a single word except for salam in da morning for more than 2 weeks,remain busy in talkin to others showing as if it doesnt matter at alll we not talkin to each other,My God in alllll dese 6 or 7 months i really hav realised how imp can sombody b,nd how much it hurts being ignored by somone whose center of attention u've been for more than 5 years.i dont know y is it happenin,yyyyyyyy?none of us getting bak to normal...........i guess somthing really has hurt badly,dose words always keep on echoing in my ears,even wen i try to forget but i cannot.....but all alllll has really destroyed somthing specail nd really dear at heart to me.:(
its really getting toooo much for me:(,unable to bear all dis....i guessss tooo many misunderstandings in b/w or a sense of insecurities........
really praying to plz make every thing get bak to normal......coz i dont like to cry,b sad,upset,depressed,not enjoying every single bit of wats happenin around me nd staying quiet even wen i want to speak up.this time m unable to stop my tears coming out every second,either at univ,in da classs noticing every bit of attitude shown,on da way bak,sleeping,studying.trying not to face my mom she might discover dat i've been crying nd ask me da reason.my dear Lord plz mkae thigs better for me.
i want da same laughter,dat smile dat greeted me every morning,dat care,da concern abt my preparing for da test or not,dat curiosity in da eyes wanting to tell me all da internal happenigs as soon as possible,pre tests,vivas,sessionals worries being expressed,allll in allll i want my frend nd my frendship bakkkkkkkkkkk.:(